This year, I arrived only the day before Christmas Eve to a house already in full holiday swing: My younger siblings (well, and my dad) nosed around in the mounting stacks of gifts under the tree, the house was decorated and smelled of fruit tea, the cookies had been made and decorated, even Perry Como crooned from the record player. The stage was set, and all I had to do was walk on and fill in my part.

Though that scenario may not sound ideal to you, it works perfectly for me in my role as the mysterious black sheep daughter/sister. In the past six months, I've been closer to and have gotten along better with my family than I ever have in the past, but that doesn't prevent me from seeing myself as separate from them somehow. I kept the details of my life to myself for so long that I naturally resist against sharing much with them.

Thus, to walk onto the Christmas stage and fill my part, say my lines, is easy for me. The problem comes when the scene drags on for too long: I've not even been home for a week yet I'm already somewhat prepared to go back to school. There are still some friends I'd like to see, but I'm feeling stifled by the fact that I will be here until the 9th of January.

I've adopted an almost-mandatory slothlike life, which is totally unnatural to someone who thrives on being busy as I do: I wake up groggily, too well rested after 9 hours of sleep. I eat breakfast, drink coffee, read the paper, and then take a shower. I while away the afternoon with more coffee, more reading, perhaps talking on the phone or cooking for awhile. After dinner, I either hang about with my family, or go out with my sister or with friends. There are no deadlines, no assignments, no errands to run. And I'm bored stiff.

If I keep on like this for 2 more weeks, I'll die of inactivity before I get back on the train to St. Paul. I miss busy intersections, bustling coffeeshops, running into friends on the street, buying the Sunday Times a stone's throw from my door. A love for my neighborhood and for city life in general has snuck up on me, unrealized until I left it for the mundanity of suburbia

I realized after completing yesterday's entry that, though I had called it "Christmas", I didn't come within swinging distance of that topic. Today, I'll write what I should have yesterday..